You can’t imagine it, Jessie J says. At that moment preparing for her comeback record in nearly a decade, ecstatically in love with her current love, and at long last the mom to a little one after struggling to conceive for ten years, on top of the world. Then in March she was diagnosed with breast cancer.
The musician, birth name J. Cornish, is known for telling it as it is. The LP, the provocatively titled album, was meant as an open book, tackling every bit of hardship she’d experienced since she last recorded music (a gynecological condition, pregnancy loss, broken romances, psychological manipulation, mental health struggles) with her usual frankness. The lead track, No Secrets, was dropped in the spring. But by then there existed a huge secret. The illness. Later second single, the upbeat Living My Best Life, came out in May and she was speaking publicly about how she was thriving, while still secretly living with the disease. A month later she shared the news, and in July she had a mastectomy.
She gives me her best “What the fuck?” look. “I release with a song called No Secrets. I’m giving every press talk, and they’re, like, ‘Any updates?’ and I respond, ‘Uh, nothing really’” the singer has just had to cancel tour dates because she’s yet to undergo cosmetic procedures.
We meet at a photo studio in London. She is dressed in a tan faux-leather coat, denim trousers with ornate white designs, beige footwear and big frames. Picture motorcycle style meets vintage look. “As if I’m in the seventies and I should have a man with facial hair.” Easy Rider, I say, referencing the film. “I was nicknamed that in school!” She smiles. Jessie is quick, unfiltered and filter-free. She says she has always wanted to try comedy and is planning to attempt her first comedy performance soon. “I enjoy humor. During performances I basically roast the audience.”
Personal Battles and News
She was planning an performance at the Baftas when she noticed an abnormality. “I quickly sought to get it examined, had an scan, and they told me, ‘It seems benign; you’ve got really good dense breast tissue.’ And I insisted, ‘But I can feel it. I have arm pain and tingling in my hands whenever I wake up.’ And they replied, ‘We should biopsy it?’ It happened on March 28, the following my birthday.” It was a weekend eve. The specialist told her if it was bad news she’d contact on the Monday. By then the singer had assured herself it was fine. The way she describes it, it was inopportune to face illness when she had so much on.
“We’re two weeks away from debuting the project after a long hiatus and four years without a single. And she [the doctor] texted and said, ‘Can you talk at six?’ And I assumed, ‘Oh, it’s a Zoom, it won’t be anything.’ So I join the call expecting it’s all going to be fine, and she informs me, ‘Please take a seat.’ That sympathetic voice? And she says, ‘I’m so, so sorry but your biopsy results have come back as high-grade cancer cells.’” What was your reaction? “I said, ‘Well, that’s not great. The timing is terrible.’ Immediately I felt was, ‘I can’t die because my son needs me.’”
Some men find me challenging due to my self-awareness
She viewed the procedure frightening and surreal. “I fear going under. They lead you. During crises you go on a gurney, but then I just marched with a gown on and my rear exposed. You feel like you’re in an episode of Black Mirror.” But, she notes, she’s been fortunate. Without chemo or radio, just the surgery. “Cancer is awful, but yet I’m grateful it was caught soon. I had the mastectomy recently and my one side now resembles a fruit under fabric.” She smiles again. “The nipple was preserved.”
The follow-up procedure is both medical and cosmetic. Her breasts, she observes, are now “uneven. They didn’t do an implant as small as my original. That’s impolite! I felt, why make it worse, I’m already having a rough time. Such disrespect! Ironically I said I’d avoid breast surgery because I’ve got perfectionism, and I know they’d never be perfect. My plans were disrupted.”
A History of Health Challenges
She is accustomed to medical issues. She thinks her perspective on the cancer has been so upbeat because she’s experienced in physical challenges. Frequently they align with professional successes, acting as a reminder, or punch in the stomach, to remind her not to assume everything is fine. “Honestly, I feel life goes, ‘You having a good time? Hold on.’ From a young age, it has consistently accompanied moments of success for me; a serious or unusual issue has affected my well-being.”
She recalls to her childhood, already making her debut featuring in the stage in Whistle Down the Wind (she was selected at the age of 9). That’s when she was told about the heart condition WPW, which can cause a fast heartbeat as well as vertigo and irregular beats. “I was going in and out of rehearsals on an IV drip, and returning to the hospital at night.” She jumps ahead six years, and 17-year-old Jess has become part of the girl group Soul Deep while enrolled in the academy. “I secured a deal, and I had a stroke. Then when I was ready to debut in recently I had a automobile accident and my larynx moved up and I was unable to vocalize for a long period.”
Oi, I say, wait, I am overwhelmed. A stroke so young? She nods|agrees
